An Update On That Party We’re Planning

“We should play ‘Welcome to New York’ when everyone is arriving at the reception!”

“Like…the Taylor Swift song?”

“Yeah!”

To clarify, the first and third lines above were said by Brian. I was the one questioning whether he was aware that he did, in fact, choose a Taylor Swift song to welcome our guests, and whether he was serious.

He was, and he was.

Needless to say, Brian and I are still getting married.

...and we are registered at "puppies." (This is Bailey. She's a three-month-old labradoodle and I am downright obsessed with her. She likes to get all excited and run for a second and then lay down a lot. Spirit animal.)
…and we are registered at “puppies.” (This is Bailey. She’s a three-month-old labradoodle and I am downright obsessed with her. She likes to get all excited and run for a second and then lay down a lot. Spirit animal.)

Somehow we have already been engaged for more than four months, which means we have five months to go until the wedding. I don’t understand.

YUP...and The New York Times is ON IT.
YUP…and The New York Times is ON IT. (But we are getting married this year…and on a Saturday. Somehow.)

According to The Knot, Martha Stewart Weddings, Brides magazine, various other online checklists, and several former brides, we are frighteningly behind schedule in the planning process. But we’re slowly moving along, making decisions about our first dance song (decided!), how many Pitbull songs is an acceptable number of Pitbull songs for the reception (as if there’s a limit), what to do about hotel blocks (the least fun project so far, so we put my dad on it), and where to head for our honeymoon (there will be giraffes).

My sweetest friend Kelly — we grew up dancing together and choreographing car dances to "Baby Got Back" and now she's a famous wedding planner — sent me this awesome package when Brian and I got engaged. LOOK AT WHAT'S ON THE BOX. There was not a giraffe inside, though. She must have forgotten to pack it!
My sweet friend Kelly — we grew up dancing together and choreographing car dances to “Baby Got Back” and now she’s a famous wedding planner — sent me this awesome package when Brian and I got engaged. LOOK AT WHAT’S ON THE BOX. There was not a giraffe inside, though. She must have forgotten to pack it!

This is clearly the beginning of a post about the wedding planning process, so if that’s not your scene, that little X in the corner of your browser tab should take care of that for you, and I’ll see you next week (I’m off to DC for the weekend with the whole Feller fam!). Otherwise, stick around: Here’s a rundown on how wedding things are shaping up around here.

KELLY WROTE THIS WHOLE BOOK. NBD. (Except it is a BD. She's awesome.)
KELLY WROTE THIS WHOLE BOOK. NBD. (Except it is a BD. She’s awesome.)

I wanted a fall wedding, and we’re having a fall wedding. That was really the only thing I felt strongly about: fall. I didn’t have a specific date in mind, but threw September 26 on the table since it was a Saturday and it should hopefully be warm then without being sweaty hot (even though I <3 Sweat) or too cold when the sun goes down.

Casual NYC sunrise.
Casual NYC sunrise.

Not only will our wedding be September 26, but both my parents and Brian’s parents were married on September 27. What are the odds of that? Like one in 365, right? I love the coincidental significance of our date and that we get to share anniversaries (one day off) with our families. I’m a sap. Leave me aloooone.

This is my parents on their wedding day. Hopefully we get that same weather. Hopefully Brian wears that same tuxedo.
This is my parents on their wedding day. Hopefully we get that same weather. Hopefully Brian wears that same tuxedo.

I spent one day dress shopping and bought the fourth dress I tried on. I went to four dress shops. I loved two dresses, both at the first shop of the day. I went back the next morning to make my decision and subsequent purchase. I spent the next 48 hours having the most dramatic emotional meltdowns of all time.

Not where I got my dress.
Not where I got my dress.

I don’t know why I was so emotional and irrational and freaked out. I showed pictures of the two dresses I loved to about a dozen people, desperate for them to tell me I picked the right one (which they all did — good friends). I hated myself for reacting so strongly to the purchase and felt like a demon. Two days later, I was over it. It’s a dress. I love it. And I look forward to actually getting to see it again in, oh, August. (Also, this seems to be a common reaction. I’ve talked to a ton of people who all said they had freakouts after buying their dresses. Damn you, wedding industry, for making us all crazy!)

Poor Mom came all the way from New Hampshire to help and instead had to put up with my crazy all weekend. SORRY, MOM, WILL U PLZ STILL COME TO THE WEDDING? IT'S IN SEPTEMBER.
Poor Mom came all the way from New Hampshire to help and instead had to put up with my crazy all weekend. SORRY, MOM, WILL U PLZ STILL COME TO THE WEDDING? IT’S IN SEPTEMBER.

I am very concerned with making my guests comfortable and happy. People say it’s “our day,” but I want my parents, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandmothers, former coworkers, and college friends to be happy and not feel inconvenienced by our wedding. I know Brian and I will have fun no matter what. I want them to have fun, too. The open bar should help with that. A few people have asked if we’re having a “signature drink” (because that’s a thing), and the answer is “a lot of champagne.” Maybe some Throwback Franzia late-night. We’ll see.

MAYBE SOME LATE NIGHT TIGER SUITS, I DON'T KNOW.
MAYBE SOME LATE NIGHT TIGER SUITS, I DON’T KNOW.

We did our tasting and it was fun. As much as I love food and spend every minute of every day thinking about food, I don’t care all that much about our wedding food. I remember a few key treats from various weddings — lobster rolls during cocktail hour at a wedding in Rhode Island, cannoli “nachos” from a country club wedding in Connecticut, and killer homemade mac and cheese from my cousin’s wedding in New Jersey — but generally the meal is not the highlight for me. I like the cocktail hour and the dancing and the toasts.

We’re not doing a seated dinner — we agreed on that immediately. We’ll have tons of passed Hors d’Oeuvres (can anyone spell that word correctly without Googling it?) and food stations, but no seated three-course assigned seating situation. Yay no seating chart!

Bailey says you can sit wherever you want. She doesn't care.
Bailey says you can sit wherever you want. She doesn’t care.

I am excited to address our invitations. I think it will be a fun project for me. I like to write stuff. Remind me I said this in two months when I have a pile of unaddressed envelopes and hate my life and finally say, “Screw it, we’re sending e-vites.” We also haven’t designed or ordered our invitations yet, because we have to figure out the logistics of sending a goldendoodle puppy to every single person we invited, with a note around its collar saying “Woof you join us at our wedding?”

OH LOOK, IT'S BAILEY AGAIN!
OH LOOK, IT’S BAILEY AGAIN!

Brian and I both decided early on that we weren’t going to try to have a Manhattan wedding. We assumed it would be too expensive, and were hoping to find something we loved on Long Island or in Hudson Valley.

We are having a Manhattan wedding. And I am insanely excited about that.

This will do. (So will I. As in..."I do.")
This will do. (So will I. As in…”I do.”)

I am supposed to be #sheddingforthewedding? I ate chocolate chips for breakfast yesterday, nachos for lunch, and pudding for dinner. So it’s going really well. Eventually I will feel motivated to clean up my diet and start picking up some heavy weights…right?

I took a class at The Fhitting Room a few months ago. I was sore until roughly yesterday because I had to move a kettlebell out of my way.
I took a class at The Fhitting Room a few months ago. I was sore until roughly yesterday because I had to move a kettlebell out of my way at one point.

So far our wedding is super personal. One of our near and dear friends is getting ordained to officiate the ceremony (guess who!). Our photographer is someone I worked with for years at Dance Spirit. (She’s not a wedding photographer — she’s a dance and fashion photographer for The New York Times — but I asked very nicely.) Our day-of coordinator was referred to us by a friend, and he’s fabulous and amazing and I love him. Our videographers are guys who have worked for Brian for a long time.

That's our officiant on the right!!! His name is Expo, he lives in New Hampshire, and his hobbies include eating baby carrots and spitting baby carrots at people.
That’s our officiant on the right!!! His name is Expo, he lives in New Hampshire, and his hobbies include eating baby carrots and spitting baby carrots at people.

The only flowers we’ll have will be for my bouquet and my bridesmaids’ bouquets. Are you a cheap florist in NYC? MySpace me. Let’s talk. (Yeah no but seriously, are you? Referrals welcome. And I know a few people suggested getting the flowers at Costco, but please explain that further. Do I buy them in bulk and then build the bouquets myself? Because that’s a little beyond my skill set.)

I want whiter teeth. Tell me how to do that. Will Crest White Strips make my teeth stripey and super sensitive? I read too many Amazon reviews about them (even though my uncle is a dentist and already gave me the run-down).

OH JUST ANOTHER PIC OF ME AND BAILEY. DON'T BE MAD.
OH JUST ANOTHER PIC OF ME AND BAILEY. DON’T BE MAD.

Registering would have been more fun if we didn’t live in a 12-square-foot one-bedroom New York City apartment. Blenders, food processors, stand mixers, and heart-shaped waffle makers are all precious — if you have a house in the country. We registered for things like “a small spoon” and “collapsible tupperware” and “Celine Dion Las Vegas show tickets” (not really on the last one, but maybe.)

Four bikes, one Selena Gomez, and two little llamas. We are officially at capacity in the Feller/Cristiano household.
Four bikes, one Selena Gomez, a buttload of Lululemon, and two little llamas. We are officially at capacity in the Feller/Cristiano household.

Yes, I will be going for a run the morning of the wedding. Obviously.

When you think you're just casually picking a wedgie and no one will see, and then this ends up in the November Project Facebook album. I don't even regret it. I look psyched.
When you think you’re just casually picking a wedgie and no one will see, and then this ends up in the November Project Facebook album.

I’m undecided on whether or not I want a veil. When the nice lady put a veil on me at the dress shop, I loved it. When she showed me how much it cost, I was less excited. I’m pretty picky about which veils I like (fingertip) and which ones I’m less into (any other kind), and when it comes to the budget, I’d rather spend the dollars on gold glitter high-tops than a piece of flimsy white see-through fabric. (Please give me your veil. Something borrowed.)

Before we get married, Brian has to do two things: He has to join me for a class at Lyons Den, and he has to come to a November Project workout. Two of the most important things in my life, and yet he hasn’t experienced either.

If on the morning of our wedding he hasn’t down-dogged and burpee-ed with me, I’m calling this shit off. I’m sure our friends and family will understand and will all come back to NYC when we announce that it’s back on and that Brian is newly addicted to both Crow Pose and running loops around Gracie Mansion.

This is me and Brian at November Project. DIFFERENT BRIAN, THOUGH.
This is me and Brian at November Project. DIFFERENT BRIAN, THOUGH.

Tyler is going to be our ring bearer. He is definitely allowed to wear his Elsa hair down the aisle. In fact, maybe I can ask him to fashion me some Elsa hair as a makeshift veil.

The best Elsa hair variation yet. I don't even know what that is, but this is how my brother found him when he picked him up from school. Incredible.
The best Elsa hair variation yet. I don’t even know what that is, but this is how my brother found him when he picked him up from school. Incredible. #microfashion

I am still obsessed with reading wedding magazines even though they aren’t very helpful or practical or inspiring. $9.99 for the latest issue of The Knot? Take my money!

Easter Sunday in New Hampshire: The Knot, Cadbury Minis, and stirrup pants. LIVING THE SUBURBAN DREAM.
Easter Sunday in New Hampshire: The Knot, Cadbury Minis, and stirrup pants. LIVING THE SUBURBAN DREAM.

We have officially put down enough deposits on various things that eloping is no longer on the table.

So we’ll see you in September. I’ll be the one in the white dress. Hopefully I still like it.

HERE’S A QUESTION: What am I forgetting to do? According to the checklists, a lot. According to you…?

Ali

Ali

68 Responses

  1. Your post is awesome=) It so funny and truly=) Your idea about running is very helpful=) I will bother it;) I am a future bride and I am a bit nervous now=) It so long till my wedding ceremony(8 month) but I have already search a perfect dress and not far ago I visit web site Weddingforward.com. Now at least I know in what style it will be.Vintage!!!=)

  2. So far behind.. catching up on posts (HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!) but seriously Vistaprint for invites. I did ALL of my paper things on there (invites, menu, programs) and they came out amazing and were super cheap. Use the best coupon code (usually 60% off!) Also, we did RSVP’s online to save money. My husband is a computer genius (I am not…) and built the site for us. It was awesome. This was 4 years ago and now I think theknot.com sites actually can do RSVP’s as well. Good luck with making all the final decisions! It’s all worth it in the end… And at the end of the day, as long as you are married, that is all that matters. 🙂

  3. “cocktail reception” or “cocktails and hors d’oeuvres to follow” for your invites maybe? I think that’s a great idea. Sounds like your wedding will be awesome. Good luck on that veil craft.. I’m sure you can do it!

  4. Ali- PRAISE you for doing no sit down dinner! I love it! Can you eventually post your menu and stations? This is exactly what I am dreaming of doing! Also how will you word that on your invitation?

    1. Happy to post the final menu and stations once we have it all finalized! You’ve got it. Haven’t thought about the wording on the invitations — we’re keeping the invitations short and simple, I think, since most of the information will be on the eventual “wedding website.”

  5. In case it’s not already in the comments above, you can find a florist you like/trust and have them order a bunch of the flowers you want for the bouquets, in bulk. You can pick them up and hand-tie bouquets the day before–it’s reasonably easy, I swear! But then, I went with red roses for mine and white for the ‘maids, so…anything more complicated/interesting would probably be harder. 😉 (I did not care about flowers. I cared about cake,. We found a baker who made cannoli filling. AMAZING.)

    Honestly, Ali, your wedding plans sound really, really great. You’ll have fun, and your loved ones will have fun, and OMG YOU HAVE AN ACTUAL PHOTOJOURNALIST to work with, so you’ll have excellent action photos to remind you of everything. YAY!

  6. My husband and I got married on 1-9-09. That was the only cutesy thing we did! We were flaking on setting a date, looked at the calendar and just picked it one day. It was a Friday in January. The only day it didn’t snow in Jan that year (RI!)
    We spent a ton of money the week or two before. On what, I don’t remember. But that’s just how it worked out.
    We had a DJ I won at an expo (they gently snatched the ball away from my then finance, as he played the game and won again, asking if our friends could have that package).
    I think you have plenty of time. Visit a few florists, visit the grocery store. Pick what’s in season and “local” to the area. My whole foods has beautiful flowers…can you NOT tell them it is for a wedding? Since it was winter, we just did roses, mini and regular sized white and red and it was very simple and pretty. I had a hard time explaining to the very traditional florist that no, i didn’t want it filled in with baby’s breath. IF you can find an older place that’s out of the way you might get a deal. Just know what you want.

  7. Oh, and White Strips are good! Also, I just ordered my flowers from the counter at my grocery store. I was planning to just scoop up some of those cheap bouquets on the morning of, but I realized that I would have more peace of mind if I knew what I was getting and that it would be ready for me when I got there. The prices were good, but I’m not in New York.

  8. Yay yayy yayyy! You still have loads of time, seriously. Mine’s a month out now, and there is lots to do, but I’m realizing that most of the actual orders and things have to be so close to the date, I’m not really sure why I’ve been stressing so much for the past almost year!

    My big advice would be don’t worry so much about #sheddingforthewedding and instead focus on exercising in a way that makes you feel emotionally happy and physically good. I stopped worrying about those last ten pounds I had wanted to drop (eh, I’ll do it later), and I’m thinking more about exercising to bust up my anxiety, and I feel so much better. I don’t need another obligation right now, I need time out to make myself feel good!

  9. I went for a run on the morning of my wedding and it was awesome! Definitely needed to get some nervous energy out, but I did get chased by the world’s largest goose (no joke). I survived and married a pretty amazing dude.

  10. I think there should be no limit on Pitbull, as long as you balance it out with some Earth Wind and Fire. I also feel like you are my wedding planning spirit animal, except that I have yet to buy a wedding magazine… or find a venue. I even looked at an alpaca farm, so the llama officiant would’ve worked out well. I didn’t want Manhattan either, but now I’m ready to give up driving around the tri state area on weekends. There are some crazy whitening suggestions, but I think Crest White Strips work pretty well!

  11. I think you are my wedding planning spirit animal. We did tons of passed apps and food stations, no seating chart, cocktail reception style wedding. When asked the theme I regularly replied “Wedding”.

    As for the wedding dress regret, you will have it on and off until the morning of your wedding when you realized how amazing you’re going to look in that shit and keep telling your bridesmaids “But seriously, look at my ass in this thing!” It will be amazing.

  12. I had fake flowers from save on crafts. They were only one type of flower not a mixed bouqet but I didn’t care enough and in glad I didn’t waste money. Plus a year later they are sitting on my kitchen counter in a vase so I get to see them everyday.

  13. Flowers: my partner and I are having a combo birthday/anniversary party instead of a wedding reception (we got married in city hall 3 years ago). The party is actually tonight!!! I went VERY low key on everything. For flowers for the tables, I bought 30 of the $10 mini bouquets that Whole Foods sells, and put them into jelly jars. Took about 30 min to assemble, and they look great! I’m feeling very smart and thrifty!

  14. I got married on 10/26, my sis on 6/26, my brother on 4/26, and my bro-in law on 9/26. All coincidental with venue availability (and I didn’t even know my now husband at the time of his brother’s and my sister’s weddings). All that to say, welcome to the 26th club. It’s the best.

    I don’t think I have anything else unique to say compared to above… but is Coach Cane going to be your officiant?!

  15. Hi Ali! Long time reader, first time commenter. I LOVE the wedding update posts. I’m also getting married and wanted to let you know that you aren’t alone in freaking out about your dress choice. I had two I loved. Purchased mine over a month ago, and I still have mini panic attacks about choosing the wrong dress. I’ve emailed the lady who I bought the dress from probably a dozen times. I’m sure she hates me.

    Crest white strips are a must. I’ve done them and had no problems with them. Most importantly, they actually work.

  16. Ahh I remember this so well, Ive been married for a year and a half now and the prep faze was a lot more work than I expected! I am actually going to be in a wedding for my college roommate in NY in October. They live on Long Island but I actually dont know where the wedding is. We met in Florida and I live in Alaska so I’ll just be happy when the 20 hour trek to NY will be complete!

    Lastly, I understand the bikes, we had an office in our house and now because we don’t have a garage it is the bike storage room. Lord forbid the bikes be out in the storage shed, I suppose they are probably the most expensive thing I own after my house. Ehh what can you do!

  17. make (or assign a bridesmaid to make) a “getting ready” mix for the day of the wedding!!! play while you and your bridesmaids are doing hair and makeup. and make sure someone remembers to bring a portable music player to wherever you are getting ready. so key. my best friend from high school was assigned to make mine. it was filled with guilty pleasure songs from our high school days and kicked off an awesome dance party to start the day. 🙂

  18. I’m getting married in three weeks… this post was just the shot of mid-stage planning excitement I needed this morning!

    Think broader on your registry. Do you have nice luggage? What about artwork and wall decor (you can get it at Bed Bath and Beyond, and to an extent at Crate and Barrel)?

    Here is what you are forgetting. Right now, before you get crazy, book yourself a weekend away about a month before the wedding. It can be with Brian or your mother or a couple of close friends – whoever calms you. Go somewhere you can relax and unplug a bit and think about something besides wedding, because (unless you are far more un-bridezilla-y than me, and I thought I was pretty much the anti-bridezilla) by that point you will be having daily meltdowns about seriously stupid things, and a few days to remember that you are a human being and not a permanent vassal of the wedding industry will do you a world of good.

  19. we should get the boys to a lyons den class together. that way, when BT hates me afterward, at least he wouldn’t have suffered alone? hah.

  20. Im getting married in june and I literally signed up for wedding wire the other day so I could maybe print off a wedding day timeline….it then informed me that I had 455437875 overdue tasks, so I basically panicked and cancelled the account. Lol. And now i have a rash on my neck? Wtf is that about. We are having a wedding ceremony on the beach followed by party at a beach bar. No seating charts is the way to go!!!

    Im actually planning on doing my own flowers …heading to the grocery store that am and using whatever is available…..everyone says dont do this but I say yes. I love all flowers but also dont think its a big deal for the wedding (mind yoU, casual, at a bar).

  21. Just wanted to give some high fives and jazz hands for a September 26th wedding date! It’ll be my 5 year wedding anniversary this year so I think you arbitrarily chose wisely 😉 All the best – fall weddings are awesome!

  22. I’ve been using activated charcoal as a teeth whitener and I think it works! Also the hydrogen peroxide suggestions are spot on, but I have this fear that I’m going to swallow it and burn up my insides.

  23. the best and cheapest teeth whitener (and don’t think this is crazy) is hydrogen peroxide. use it as a mouth wash twice daily, it tastes like water, just don’t swallow it.

  24. Try activated charcoal for your teeth. It’s messy but I swear it works!

    Also, too much Pitbull? What does that even mean? You must have meant to arrange those words differently. 🙂

  25. I would highly suggest checking out apracticalwedding.com. They have so many helpful posts on so many things… I really relied heavily upon that site when we were planning our wedding.

    We DIY’ed our flowers, but my mom also used to be a florist… So that was helpful. And we had a nice, cool basement to store them in overnight. We bought them at a local market & supplemented with more from Costco. If you’re not super picky about the type, and have an adequate space to store them, I think it can be a good way to go. The aforementioned site has great posts on DIY’ing flowers.

    The one thing I’d make sure you think about if you haven’t already is having a plan for break down & clean up after the party. If you have a coordinator, they’re probably already on top of this, but we didn’t, and I felt bad that a lot of work post-reception fell on our family because we didn’t adequately plan for it. This may not be an issue based on your reception space, but ours was pretty bare bones. I think in the end, if you can pay someone to take care of it, it’s totally worth it.

    Love your blog – thanks for sharing your life with us random folks on the internet! I’m actually moving to NYC (well, up the Hudson a bit… somewhere near Pleasantville but TBD in the next few months) later this year. I’m excited to explore all that the city has to offer! If you have any tips for people moving to the area, I’d love to hear them.

  26. So yes I can spell Hors d’Oeuvres without googling it as I had to spell it correctly on every test in college as a Hospitality Management major. I would get points deducted for spelling it incorrectly.

    I know a friend who had her bouquets made at Whole Foods in the flower department and by an intern so it was really reasonable.

  27. Whole Foods should be able to do bouquets for you! The one by me always has a bunch of pretty options. And I’ll take a Bailey please, so cute!

  28. I went to a ton of dress shops, tried on a ton of dresses … and ended up buying the dress I fell in love with online before setting foot in a single shop. And my veil cost about half what my dress did, WTF.

    I also only did bride & maids bouquets for flowers, because that stuff is expensive and no one cares about boutonnieres (another word I can’t spell wihout looking up).

    Other stuff – DJ, wedding band or iTunes?

  29. Oh where to start…first, awesome post!

    We were so fortunate to have an officiant, DJ, and singer that we knew. Made the day so much more special, especially the officiant part.

    As far as veil, no veil. I was opposed to a veil because I thought it was a waste of money. My mom dug hers out. It was yellowed and 80,000 feet long, but we found a local seamstress who, for like $20, cut it to the length I wanted, and bleached it to get it back to white. At the end of the day, it felt so special to wear that on my big day. Maybe you or Brian’s mom still have their veil and wouldn’t mind you butchering it? Just a thought.

    As far as a florist, I had a cousin who at one point worked as a florist. I did the same and just did bouquets and boutonnieres (talk about hard to spell words) and didn’t spend money on any other flowers. It was still slightly pricey but not anything like it could have been. I’ve had a lot of friends go through a grocery store with a floral department it was pretty affordable, especially if you don’t want anything fancy.

    Good luck!

  30. 1. Vistaprint is AMAZING for invites. A third of the cost (or less) than all the official Wedding Invite sites, great quality, super-speedy shipping. Highly recommend. We got invites, RSVP cards, matching thank-you cards, and save the dates for less than we would have paid for invites alone elsewhere.

    2. I’ve been using Listerine whitening mouthwash and it seems to be somewhat helping?

    3. My mom made my veil. She said the comb plus the fabric cost like $5. If you know someone who knows how to sew, they could likely do the same for you, especially if you want something pretty simple. Lots of tutorials online.

    Can you tell that I am also planning my wedding? 🙂

    P.S. My bachelorette is this weekend and my only demand to my bridal party was “get me a FEYONCE tank like this girl I know from the internet has.” And they did. YAY.

  31. YAY WEDDING UPDATE!!!!! As you know the only update I have for you is that I am starting to train to run with you on wedding day. #goodbridesmaid

    Because of that one time I got married and forced you all to do Flywheel that morning.

    Next up, BACHELORETTE PARTY!!!!! WE THOUGHT YOU SAID PRIZE!!!!!

  32. Buy your veil off of etsy! I bought the perfect veil (finger length) off of etsy at a fraction of the price at all of the bridal shops!

  33. I did costco for my flowers. They have wedding packages (where you can swap things out depending on how many corsages/boutonnieres/bouquets you need. I also ordered bulk flowers to slap together some center pieces. My bulk flowers were not up to my standards when they arrived and costco paid for a local florist to deliver 100 white roses (everything we did was white roses, so easy to throw in some vases) to replace them.

  34. The biggest things are your vendors. If they are all booked, you can work on the little stuff a bit at a time.

    I spent $200 on my veil and $800 on my dress (in 2009 money – David’s Bridal). Such a rip-off. Luckily it matched my cousin’s dress too and she wore it a year later. Definitely borrow one if you can!!

    Not sure what you have in NYC but I know grocery stores can be a cheap source of flowers. Some make bouquets and some you can buy and then arrange yourself (or have a friend do it). Trader joes has really nice flowers!

  35. You forgot cake. CAKE. Literally the most important part of the whole wedding. It doesn’t even have to look good, there just has to be lots of cake so I can keep sneaking back for seconds/thirds/etc.

  36. Crest White Strips. DO IT. They are amazing.

    Check Etsy and David’s Bridal for veils…much cheaper, but you can hardly tell the difference in quality from the high end boutiques. At least that’s what I did. Then I took my veil off post-ceremony and lost it somewhere. I was really glad that I didn’t spend too much $$ on it.

  37. This is so exciting! I’ve been engaged for almost a year and have no date in mind and haven’t started planning lol! I’m not a wedding person and neither is my fiance, so we’re actually just going to fly to Belize and have a ceremony there. No planning to do besides booking flights and the hotel. My kind of wedding 🙂

  38. So I never comment on any blogs, but I read yours regularly and love it. I got married in Long Island City in November, and if you are looking for a local florist who isn’t crazy expensive, you should check out Violet and Verde, which is based in Brooklyn. The florist’s name is Bridget and she couldn’t have been better or sweeter. I swear I don’t work for her, I just loved how the flowers, bouquets and decorations came out, especially because I didn’t think those were things that would matter much to me.

  39. The veil! Go to Etsy right now and search for them!!! I got my veil custom made for something like $30 and it was prettier than the veils I tried on in the store that cost hundreds. Do it! So excited for you! 🙂

  40. You are awesome. NP will welcome Brian with open arms and hopefully not scare him off 🙂 Also, NP has the lovely ability to put some of the worst pictures online. Good job Paul Leak.

  41. Hi!

    Potential veil help here. I ended up buying a hair comb at Target and having the woman who altered my dress to include a bussle (sp? Forgive me, as I’m on the west coast and just woke up) sew some tule that matched my dress to it. She did it for like $15. It didn’t have sparkly stuff or beads, but I didn’t care. It worked perfectly! Be careful ordering online because apparently if the color is off it’s really noticeable.
    🙂

  42. Yay, i’m so happy to read about your wedding. I’m getting married in July and have completely given up any notion that it’s “our” day. The ceremony is for us, but the reception is a huge party for all the people that we love and our #1 goal is to host it well. And regarding whiter teeth, my dentist recommended crest white strips after my last cleaning before the wedding (which coincidentally is 3 weeks before the wedding). Congrats!

  43. I LOVE WEDDING POSTS!!!! (oh i’m totally single and light years away from my wedding, and have no idea what my own will look like?) not.the.point. Anyways, I’d get on that invitation b.s. of my friends who recently got married that has been the biggest pain. I love the idea of all of the “snacks” (not spelling that word, even if it just requires scrolling up). As for flowers, I know nothing, but love the wedding date you managed to snag, nice work! I’d love another wedding post sometime.

  44. I love your blog so darn much. I am getting married the week before you, and am thinking about getting my veil from Rent the Runway… roughly $40. Especially since you live in NYC and could actually go to the show room and try it!!!!! Also, there is no such thing as too much Pitbull.

  45. I know I don’t know you and everything but you can totally borrow (or buy!) my veil! I didn’t wear it for my wedding, I borrowed my cousin’s as my ‘something borrowed’. It’s pretty simple and goes down my back to the top of my butt. If you’re interested, let me know…they are insanely expensive!!!

    ..also, I only wore the veil for the ceremony, then I took that junk off!!haha!

  46. I was anti-veil, but my mom really wanted me to wear it for my (outdoor) ceremony so I agreed. And planned to take it off right after the ceremony. 30 seconds before walking down the aisle I got pooped on by a bird. Veil saved the day because poo on a $10 veil off Ebay is much easier to get rid of than crap on a pretty (and expensive) dress you plan to wear for 8+ more hours. Probably not helpful, but I feel the need to share my cautionary tale.

    1. Oh my gosh!!! WTF are the odds of that happening? That is insane and also kind of hilarious (since it was a best-case-bad-scenario). Seriously, WHO gets pooped on right before walking down the aisle? And I love that that’s your reasoning for getting a veil.

      1. It was hysterical and makes for a fantastic story. And apparently getting sh!t on by a bird is good luck? Says the people that it didn’t happen to. Also proof that moms are always right. Always.

  47. get a florist! I’m a wedding florist and i can’t tell you how many last minute brides we have come bum rushing our shop because some aunt was like OMG ILL DO YOUR FLOWERS and then realizes how hard and stressful it is (i.e. ordering flowers from somewhere and they all show up DEAD)…its worth the $$ to pay for someone to take one less huge stressor away from you! Theres so many simple bouquets that can keep the budget low!

  48. Okay, so you are totes going to skype us all in for the wedding, right? I mean, we’ve been a part of the whole process so….

    Also, loved this:
    “This is clearly the beginning of a post about the wedding planning process, so if that’s not your scene, that little X in the corner of your browser tab should take care of that for you, and I’ll see you next week”

    *snort* I LOVE snarky Ali.

    1. YES, OBVIOUSLY WE NEED YOU THERE. We just have to figure out how to get a goldendoodle pup to everyone who reads this blog. I AM WORKING ON IT.

  49. Crest white strips will make your teeth sensitive for like a day, and white for months. So do them in advance. And nobody can spell hors douvres, that’s why I always just say “snacks.” I can spell “snacks.”

  50. This post is hilarious, and totally made my morning. I too was hell bent on a fall ceremony, which gave me about 4-5 months to plan my wedding at the point in time we decided to go for it. Wait until the next fall? Don’t think so 🙂 To be honest, not to jinx you or anything, I ditched the official checklists and everything fell together perfectly. For cheap flowers I headed to a local farm (not sure if that’s an option for you in NYC, but surely there’s a farmer’s market full of them somewhere for contacts?) The only thing that took an unexpectedly long time was getting rings resized, so I’d pick out your bands as early as you can. I loved the months leading up to my wedding, and hope yours are as fun!

    1. Funny you should mention the rings, because that’s something we were planning on doing SUPER early, and yet every Saturday we’re like, “We’ll just do it next weekend.” We’ve been pushing off getting our rings for, oh, two months now. We are really good at this.

  51. 1. I had the SAME thought about Pitbull!!! https://twitter.com/devonapass/status/411560181139390465 We went with one (Timber, obviously). I kept breaking off conversations with guests and saying, “That’s my jam!” while running to the dance floor when great songs (like Timber) came on, and Aaron later pointed out that happened with such great frequency because I picked most of the songs for the DJ. They were all my jams.

    2. Scope my veil, you can have it if you want it! Or if you’re not that into veils, you’ll be totally fine without one. I wore mine for the ceremony and a few pics after, so only 30 minutes or so. It was fine, but I probably could have gone without it. You do you!

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about ali

I’m the creator of the Ali on the Run blog and the host of the Ali on the Run Show podcast. I’m also a freelance writer and editor, a race announcer, a runner and marathoner, a mom, and a huge fan of Peanut M&Ms, Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again (way better than the first one!), and reliving my glory days as a competition dancer in the early 2000s. I’m really happy you’re here.
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