It’s been a while!
The excuse-truth for being anti-blogging: I’m Crohnsing pretty hard.
I know I know I know I know. It’s the never-ending shitstorm, and that’s not even supposed to be a pun. Though the puns are practically unavoidable at this point. So it’s OK.
In spite of the yearlong health drama I’m in the midst of, spirits are high. I’m spending the week up in good ol’ Contoocook, NH, doing all the annual celebratory things we do: the always-exciting Target run…
…the cookie baking, the fireside card playing…
…and, new to the schedule this year, a trip to the lawyer’s office to sign my life away (my dad seems to think I need to establish my Power of Attorney stuff, so that’s taken care of — goodbye, freedom and organs).
Tonight we’ll go to a Christmas Eve party and tomorrow we’re going skiing. By Saturday, the house will be full and we’ll do “real” Christmas then with Ryan, Michaela, Tyler (!!!) and Brian (he gets exclamation points, too!!!).
Another reason for not being so big on the blogging lately: I truly don’t have much to say. Weird, I know. But this holiday season has been pretty standard as far as city celebrations go.
I rode a CitiBike for the first time.
I saw plenty of lights.
I saw The Nutcracker (New York City Ballet’s is my performance of preference), the Radio City Christmas Spectacular (I know Mrs. Claus! I know Mrs. Claus!) and a bunch of other shows.
Brian and I got a mini tree and it sheds too much. I think it was dead the day we bought it, but we loved it just the same.
I watched some holiday movies (I’m trying hard to adore Love Actually, but I don’t know…I find some of those characters to be mighty punchable) and listened to holiday music (I’m doing that at the moment, in fact, and it’s really distracting me from whatever I’m trying to write).
I got snow on my jacket.
I went to holiday parties.
And I tried to distract myself from the fact that I can’t run or, at this point, even spin by taking yoga classes. I’m fully obsessed with yoga. I can do crow pose and I know how to pronounce a lot of the fancy pose names, even if I always forget what they are. I’m also getting good at not staring at all the “awesome” people during class and focusing on my own “practice.” (Bethany, my beloved instructor, is constantly saying, “Your eyes, Ali, your eyes,” to remind me to…well, you get it. I love her.)
I got a present, despite Brian and I agreeing not to exchange any gifts this year.
Being sick definitely puts a damper on things. I’m in the bathroom a lot and I’m in pain a lot, and that’s annoying. I’m sad I won’t be going for a Christmas Eve run, or a Christmas Day run, or any run to wrap up 2013. But I guess that’s kind of the theme of the year, right?
Still, it’s the holidays. And I refuse to not be in a good mood from now until the end of the year!
I saw someone post about New Year’s Resolutions the other day, and I was like, “Aw! I remember when I used to make those!” I definitely assumed I hadn’t made any resolutions for this year.
But that’s the beauty of blogging. The internet doesn’t lie. And it seems I did, in fact, resolve to do a ton of shit in 2013.
Guess how much of it I accomplished? LOL?
Let’s find out…
I will stop grinding my teeth. Probably not.
I will fix my pathetic posture. Probably not.
I will do a fishtail braid. I did half of one, one time. It was ugly.
I will go to the Museum of Modern Art. Nope. But I went to the gift shop in SoHo the other day. Same thing?
I will go to the Guggenheim. That museum a few blocks away from my apartment? Nope. Didn’t go there.
I will learn to look both ways before crossing the street. Whatever. I can’t be bothered with this. I’m in a rush. I only resolved to do this because I sort of almost got hit by a car once while crossing the road with my coworker, and she sort of freaked out about it. I was fine. It didn’t even really hit me. It just came close. It wasn’t a big deal.
I will carry a lighter load. Like, emptying my purse? Yeah, I carry a much lighter load…because I no longer need to travel with post-work workout clothes. Success!!
I will use my crock pot. Definitely not. But Brian used it once the other day. So that’s pretty much the same thing.
I will cook spaghetti squash. I bought four spaghetti squashes over the course of this year. I cooked zero of them. I couldn’t cut them in half.
I will spend more time outside my comfort zone. I spent all my time in bathrooms, and most bathrooms aren’t comfortable. Success!
I will run with faster friends. I didn’t run with any friends all year long. Unless you count the 50,000 people I ran the New York City Marathon with. Then yes! Success!
I will be kind. Hahahahahahaha. No.
I will spend less time online. Eh. Probably not.
I will no longer hate-read. I actually did really well with this at the start of the year. But then when I got really really sick and went on medical leave, I was bored a lot, so I brought back a few of those hate-reads. I have eliminated most of them, though. Semi-success.
As always, Brian gets to give me some resolutions to ponder throughout the year. Here’s how I did with his mandates…
Don’t stress over the things you can’t change. I know you’re all probably thinking that I didn’t accomplish this, but I actually think I did. I got much better about “accepting” things this year, especially in the second half of the year. I dropped most of my OCD-inspired tendencies and stopped trying to plan stuff. My consistent goal was to get through each day and just do my best when I could. And sometimes, when I couldn’t muster the energy to do my best, I was OK with that. I was, believe it or not, so much easier on myself this year.
Stop putting things in every corner of our apartment. This was a major fail for the sickest part of the year. I was a slob. But right now, at this exact moment, the apartment is clean. So we will go off that fact and call this a victory.
Run just to have fun. The marathon was fun. No other runs this year were particularly fun, unfortunately. Every run this entire year required at least one bathroom stop. But I got out there when I could, so yay.
Bike again. I did this! When I first started feeling better this summer, I rode my bike a few times, and on two occasions much later in the summer Brian and I went on two “long” (for me, not him) bike rides (around 40 miles each time, I think).
Be nice to yourself. Always a work on progress, but I’ve actually gotten significantly better at this.
That was fun. And interesting probably only to me. Like I said, I really don’t have a whole lot of update-worthy happenings in my life at the moment.
So here’s a picture of Tyler:
And here’s another photo of Tyler, who was busy negotiating a business deal during Grandmom’s 90th birthday party last month:
Looking back at my resolution success rate, I could easily call this year a “fail.” And in the grand scheme of things, it really was. I accomplished so little of what I wanted to accomplish — going far beyond my silly resolutions — and that was frustrating. But it’s just a year. I’m about to get another one, so I’ll try again. Plus, the fact that I did ultimately get to run the marathon and have the best day ever made up for a lot of the not-best days. And that makes me so happy.
As tough as this year was and as much as I hated so many of the days that passed, I actually did learn a lot along the way.
To be continued…
Happiest holidays to you and your families.
I love you.
SHARING IS CARING: It’s been a while since we’ve really caught up, so can you talk to me? Tell me about your favorite holiday tradition and also about your biggest resolution fail this year. Or success. But the failures are fun, too!