So from what I gathered yesterday, we’re all a bunch of crazies. I’m glad it’s not just me.
Your comments on yesterday’s post about being nasty and stressed instead of fun and carefree were hilarious and I loved them. Oh. Were they not supposed to be funny? Well I thought they were good. Now let’s all vow to take one massive chill pill, shall we?
Guess what I did last night?
I didn’t freak out about stuff.
I even got into bed around 10 pm.
Who am I?! Oh, that’s right. I’m cool, Weekend Ali, making my weekday debut. No big deal.
I was equal parts productive and calm last night. I went to the gym for a Chisel class and lifted heavy things and did many squats. I did a little grocery shopping, had a long phone conversation with my best friend Becky and then had another long phone chat with my Dad.
Brian came over and I “cooked us dinner.” I’m so good at reheating leftovers, you have no idea.
I did some dishes, watched some TV and even did a little extra ab work, because that makes the commercial breaks go by faster.
I woke up this morning ready to run!
I wanted to cover seven miles, but my stomach had other plans. It was like, “Ali, you think seven miles is a good idea, but I think we should stop at that Starbucks over there so you can wait in line for the bathroom for 10 minutes and waste a ton of time.”
So I ran low on time and did six miles instead.
I’m not on a training plan right now, so I just sort of run whatever I feel like running. Today I felt like running at a pace similar to what I ran with Lauren on Sunday: quick but comfortable.
I also wanted to check in with my pace regularly but not obsess over my watch. I didn’t want to look down at it too much or rely on it too heavily. I wanted to feel fast but not too fast, and also not too slow. I’m like the Goldilocks of running, only without the braids or the porridge. Or those bears she hung out with, or whatever they were.
My stomach went into overdrive a few times, and I got bored of the park, so I ventured toward the East River and ran around there for a while. During one of my “I’m keeled over in pain and I can’t run right this second” moments, I took two photos.
I was hoping for a killer sunrise, but this morning’s was pretty blah.
I was happy with my splits, though!
Something seems off with that “warm-up” mile, but I will not complain. Overall I feel good about this morning’s run. I held onto that pace just fine — when my stomach wasn’t being rude, at least — and never felt too out of breath or overworked. I felt like I was working hard, but it was sustainable.
Lauren and Emily spent a decent amount of time and energy this weekend convincing me that I can run faster than I think. We all know this by now, right? My mental problems hold me back. I see a 7:30 on my watch and immediately panic and force myself to slow down, even if I feel great and strong.
Why is that?
What am I afraid of?
Oh right. I’m afraid of feeling great for that first mile, trying to maintain the pace and then watching my legs rip off from my body when they can’t keep up with my crazy brain.
Something like that.
So my goal right now, whether or not it brings me to a spring marathon, is to get over my fear of pushing it. I can run faster. I can be a stronger runner. I just need to go for it. Lauren encouraged me to add structured speedwork back into my weekly training, and if she wants to coach me I’m fine with that. She’s going for a 3:10 marathon, after all, so I think she knows what she’s doing.
Note to self: Running isn’t supposed to be easy. If you want to hold on to a 7-minute mile, it’s not necessarily going to feel good. Push yourself. Work hard. Enjoy the rewards and PRs.